thusia | (no subject)

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(no subject)

Who: Crazy Allen and interested parties
When: Day 25, night
Where: APT E first!
What: oh nooooo

[You know what the worst thing about coming out of a haze of totally bonkers after being securely tied up and drugged for over a day? You can't just immediately run away.

Needless to say it may be hard to even realize Allen is back to normal for like 15 minutes. Because he's still just lying there. Like a deer. Maybe if I am still enough the headlights of sanity won't totally slam into me and send me reeling oh no too late.]

((I RESERVE THE RIGHT TO DERP OUT SOON but getting started on fallout since there is a lot of it, aww yea, also we can make timespace our bitch and say your character got news he is not a huge mongler anymore))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...

I'm sorry...

It's not like I wouldn't have done the same.

[chokelaugh]

Would you... I... don't know... Aah, I can't, it's all too far...

Not so far, I'd say. Some things can't change.

[.....i... i just

idk

leans against him???]

. . .

[holds him tighter, pressing his face into his hair :x]

[bawls

why do i suuuuhuhuhuuuhhhhhkkkkk]

[stroking his hairrrr]

[ffffffffffffffffffhhhhhhhhhfnnmbmbmn]

God... if I'd just... said a little less... just a little...

. . . it can't be helped.

...

But it's . . . okay.

[holding him tighter]

[keeps his face buried at his shoulder where it is]

Is it...

Regrettable . . . of course. But a lot of things are regrettable. That doesn't mean we don't move on—? And everyone else—they're okay. They really want to forgive you, if they haven't already. For most things.

... There isn't any getting around that this is what I've always done.

On top of all that, that's what I haven't changed...

Ah . . . well, it's a little—

I won't say I like it, but I think that if you'd managed to change that about yourself, I'd be really jealous? There are just some things I can't imagine ever not being part of me, as terrible as they are. As much as I might wish otherwise.

[doesn't say anything to that for a moment...]

I guess we both at least... see it... It isn't that I don't see it and see that it hurts them.

Hahah...

Edited 2012-02-25 05:04 (UTC)

[hairpetting lightly again]

. . . though maybe, next time, don't bargain your sanity? I'm just thinking that is a bad idea.

... The only other way to bring him back was to give up a year of life, and my body would rewind or fast forward one year... it would age memories, too. I thought, I couldn't risk that... something that dramatic a change all of a sudden, and the Noah is a "memory," too... Gerasimos sounded safer in comparison.

. . .

[opens his mouth, then closes it, quietly]

That was a good selfish, wasn't it? "I can't do that, I can't risk dying if there's another option," I thought-- that's good, isn't it?

Needs work, still. Maybe.

Picky.

I know, it's terrible.

[more cuddles]

[...okay

cool]