thusia | (no subject)

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(no subject)

Who: Aerta, assorted crazies
When: Day 15, even Later Evening
Where: Appartmet e
What: Knock knock knockin' on Hydra's doooooooor

Scowl~? Are you there?

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[shakes his head slightly] It's not "now" that is so much a concern. But Central was my past, and not one I can easily absolve myself of... And I'm reminded there's not much kinship between myself and the Exorcists or anyone from Headquarters.

... Well... we got close because of all the time we spent together.

That was partially due to circumstances...

But you ended up like this. I think it's because of who you are.

I get it. But... the Order used you. Even if you were loyal before. It's not like we aren't all guilty of acting while in use of the Order and...

Maybe in this place we really all don't belong here or ought to be somewhere else. But we're all here. And whether it's possible or not, I... know I, at least, can never go back. And... you can't, either.

So if we want to belong somewhere... it has to be here. With these people, in this world.

I know here is where I want to be. But it's not somewhere I can be without acknowledging the past, whether because of guilt or lingering loyalty...

...Sorry, I realize there isn't much of a solution for this feeling, beyond giving it time.

You don't have to apologize. I understand that you can't just drop the past.

It's normal to feel like that, you know... I think...

A little caught in between and unsure how to make friends...?

Well, yeah.

We did just. Die. I think it's fair to be disoriented...

It doesn't have much to do with that...

[awkwardly]

I'm more used to meeting a need or fulfilling a role. I'm not... someone who people think of if they want to relax or have fun?

... You're not that bad... Delphinus adored you.

Mm, I know... But it was also a situation where they had few choices but to work with me, at first. And I knew my role...

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