(no subject)

[cicatrici]

Who: Xanxus, his tiny lion, and YOU!
When: Day 115, morning
Where: Arounds the shrine area to the hallway outside 2-E
What: re-intro, Xanxus struggles with simple tasks that are only necessary because of his own stupidity.

[Xanxus hasn't been out of his room much since he'd been freed from the forest. The experience had left him a little ragged and it'd taken him a while to recover. This combined with his natural laziness had resulted in his recovery period lasting several weeks. In fact, the only reason he's left his room today is due to an incident where he'd been startled awake only to instinctively shoot his door off it's hinges at what turned out to be nothing.

So he's stopped by the shrine area to get himself a new door. You might run into him on his way back, carrying the door. Or you might run into him back at his room, trying to figure out how to attach his new door. He's finding that. like many things, this is difficult to do when you only have one arm to work with!]

Comments

[apriori]

[He stops, his own door halfway open, to stare at Xanxus]

Whoa, you're alive!

[cicatrici]

The last I checked none of us here are alive.

[Despite his clever retort he isn't actually amused at all, gosh it's not like he missed your weird murder enthusiasm or anything, Shirou.]

... I just got stuck in the forest for a while.

[apriori]

You were there for a while.

[And then a thoughtful pause]

...need a hand?

[cicatrici]

[He looks at the door

back at Shirou

considers his pride

he can't properly avoid all these stupid weirdos if he can't get his new door up

weighing his options.]

... Fine.

[apriori]

[Something that is very obviously a human arm with a human hand attached is held out to Xanxus.

He was just about to try and trade this for something to clean up his own apartment and the mess his recent fight with Emiya Shirou left, but. Well.

You can't pass up an opportunity like this.]

[cicatrici]

[Xanxus is certainly less alarmed than the average person would be at the sight of that severed limb. Especially since he's picked up on several hints that Shirou is less than mentally sound.

Still, as soon as the joke dawns on him, he's not amused, and responds by frowning fiercely. At his feet, Bester lets out an angry squeak.]

If you're not actually going to be helpful then just fucking leave me alone.

[apriori]

[That face. That face was worth it. 100%. He gives Xanxus a perfectly innocent smile in return.]

I can help. I just need to put this down.

[He needs to take care of his severed limb, and thus disappears back into the apartment. The arm is going back in its spot next to the torso on his living room floor, and soon enough he reappears to give the replacement door a good stare.]

What happened to the old one?

[tenebrist]

[Passing on through, but -]

... Oh, my.

You haven't died yet?

[cicatrici]

[OH IT'S

THIS BITCH

Xanxus stops and turns to look at Michi.]

... You sound surprised.

[HE IS OFFENDED!]

[tenebrist]

It isn't a wholly unpleasant surprise, I suppose.

[Because kitty. Who gives a fuck about you though?]

Were you lost?

[cicatrici]

[Bester is of course at his heels as always. He offers a squeaky gao for Michi.]

I wasn't- [No ok he's learned by now that trying to lie to Michi is a pointless exercise.]

... I guess technically you could say that.

[tenebrist]

[Kittyyyy meow kitty.

But for once she doesn't let herself get distracted.]

How sad. Perhaps the presence of limbs affects one's sense of direction...? I wonder.

[cicatrici]

[WOW Michi guess who's not at all amused by that? This guy.]

Shut up.

...

It wasn't so much as I got lost as these fucking giant spider things caught me.

[WHICH HE IS STILL MAD ABOUT...]

[hydralize]

Ah. You're back?

[cicatrici]

I suppose I am. And you're still here.

[Just standing here with his door nbd. Not sure why he's talking to this guy when he's not physically required to stand with him!! So, you know, his usual sour mood.]

[hydralize]

I'm not pathetic enough to go missing for weeks.

[Pauses to give the door a confused look.] . . . What the hell is with that thing?

[cicatrici]

[Xanxus bristles at that insult.]

Don't pick a fight you can't win, trash.

... I needed a new one. [You don't get an explaination as to why unless you ask.]

[hydralize]

Have you even gotten any new powers since the last time we talked?

[cicatrici]

That's none of your business.

[That means no.]

[devoting]

[ Oh. No one told me you were here. ]

OH NO TWO GOKUDERAS

[cicatrici]

[Xanxus had already run into Gokudea today so he doesn't know why he's looking at him so oddly!!!]

What?

[devoting]

[ hey man, my hair is shorter and i have 100% less tattoos. and wear more than two colours! ]

The baseball idiot didn't tell me there were any Varia here.

[cicatrici]

[AS IF XANXUS WOULD PAY ATTENTION TO STUFF LIKE THAT!!!]

... I don't see why he would have to, you already should have known I'm here.

[devoting]

Tch- Don't confuse me with that other jackass.

[cicatrici]

The hell is that supposed to mean?

[A pause.]

What, are there two of you trash or something?